Over decades of pastoral counseling, I have sat with individuals who knew the Bible well—people who memorized Scripture and listened to countless sermons—yet struggled to apply what they learned to their marriages, work, relationships, and daily life.
In contrast, I’ve watched men and women who were connected in discipling relationships flourish. They still faced struggles, but they had someone to turn to—a connection where they could share life, receive support, and grow in Christ together. They integrated more quickly into the body of Christ because they were not growing alone.
Jesus commissioned to make disciples by “teaching them to obey everything I have commanded.” Content matters, and curriculum can be powerful, but it is not enough by itself. Without relationship, even strong faith can wither.
Jesus’ invitation to His first disciples was not, “Read this book and memorize these Scriptures.” Instead, He said, “Follow Me.” The apostle Paul echoed the same pattern when he wrote, “Follow me as I follow Christ.” As they spent time together, Jesus taught them, helped them apply His teachings, watched their lives, encouraged and challenged them when needed, and took time to answer their questions. Paul appears to do the same, living among believers and then following up with letters to guide them further in faith, ministry, and everyday life.
When Information Isn’t Enough
Somewhere along the way, we drifted from Jesus’ model of disciple-making and tried to do it more efficiently. We wanted to obey His command to make disciples, and we wanted to do it better. After all, Jesus also said, “greater things than these you will do.”
In our desire to help more people, we slowly adopted methods that look more like mass production than spiritual formation. We began to measure discipleship by scale, speed, and efficiency. It seemed logical and even responsible: if we could reach hundreds with the same effort required to reach a few, wasn’t that good stewardship? Yet as we shifted toward efficiency, something essential began to slip from our hands.
When discipleship becomes efficient, we start to lose relationship and connection. People may learn about Christ, but they are not known by those who follow Him. They hear truth, but no one walks with them through it. We also lose personal responsibility for making disciples. The work that Jesus assigned to believers is slowly outsourced to programs, pastors, or curriculum. Instead of forming disciples who form others, we end up producing consumers of Christian content.
In my men’s group, there’s a gentleman who describes himself as an agnostic, yet he genuinely wants to believe what the rest of us believe. He participates in discussions, asks honest questions, and sometimes challenges our assumptions. Most of the responses he receives are shared in love, but they are mostly content-driven—read this book, watch this video, listen to this explanation.
As I watch him grow frustrated, it becomes clear that he doesn’t need more information. He will never get every question answered, and we don’t have all the answers anyway. What he needs is someone to sit with him in that space of uncertainty, to walk with him amid the questions and doubt, and to invite Jesus into that space together. He has heard the gospel and knows much of the information. What he is missing is relationship—a personal encounter with Jesus carried through the care, connection, and vulnerability of friends. This is just one example of how many Christians have been discipled by knowledge alone, rather than by knowledge shared in the crucible of friendship.
When Curriculum Actually Works
Curriculum has a very important place in making disciples. What we teach and share matters. When curriculum really works, it helps set the teacher up for success. It empowers them with knowledge, tools, structure, and clear direction.
A teacher who uses curriculum faithfully takes time to study and prepare with their specific students in mind—who they are, what their lives are like, and how they might wrestle with the content. They pray for their people, not just the lesson. They bring curriculum into a relationship, a shared space where truth can be explored, questioned, and applied together. Curriculum supports discipleship. It does not lead it.
Choosing Curriculum That Supports Discipleship
If curriculum is going to serve discipleship, it should do more than provide content—it should help leaders disciple people. Ideally, the best curriculum doesn’t only explain what to teach, but offers guidance on how to shepherd those who are learning. It makes room for questions, creates space for discussion, and encourages teachers to get to know the people in the room. It may even include tips for building relationships, listening well, or inviting personal application and prayer. We should choose resources that leave space for connection instead of filling every moment with information.
Good curriculum can equip disciple-makers to do what the curriculum itself cannot. It can support the work of active listening, asking thoughtful questions, and helping people wrestle honestly with truth. It can resource someone who is modeling what it looks like to follow Jesus in real life, praying with people instead of merely praying for them. A disciple-maker helps others feel seen and known, supports them in their struggles, rejoices in their victories, celebrates spiritual progress, and offers grace in setbacks. These are the relational practices that shape a life, and no written resource can do them on our behalf.
Returning to God’s Way of Making Disciples
Curriculum matters. What we teach and share matters. But we begin to drift when we expect curriculum to carry the weight it was never designed to hold. Discipleship isn’t mass-produced; it’s carried from life to life, person to person.
The church becomes healthiest when solid content meets genuine connection—when ordinary believers are equipped not only to learn truth but to walk with others as they seek to live it. Imagine a community where people are known, encouraged, prayed with, challenged, and supported, where curriculum serves the relationship instead of replacing it. That’s the kind of church that begins to resemble the one Jesus described and demonstrated.
If we want to see lasting spiritual formation, we must return to the way Jesus made disciples—through presence, conversation, shared life, and love that walks alongside truth. Curriculum can guide. Curriculum can support. But only people can disciple.
Darrell Martin leads the Nonprofit Incubator at Vintage Church in Raleigh, North Carolina, www.vintagenc.com/nonprofit. A former pastor and leadership coach, he is committed to discipleship and helping people live out their God-given calling.
